Billy's Blanks: Agent of the White Man?

No, your eyes aren't fooling you, nor have you been mixing pills and alcohol again (or have you?)--that is indeed Billy Blanks.

For reasons beyond my puny ability to comprehend, Billy Blanks is super-duper-popular in Japan right now and his infomercials can be found playing at any given time of the day if you flip through the channels. My connections in the ecclesiastic world say Billy's starting up an Asian chapter to his already international phys-ed cult, or maybe I'm just projecting that because I want to write a screenplay about it. Whatever, this story gets better.

This poster is from the sports festival at Kusu JHS that was just yesterday and is the work of the white team. There were two other teams, but their paintings weren't nearly as mind-blowing as this one. What really makes this special is the Japanese writing underneath that reads "hakugun", literally "white soldier".

God, I love this country.

--Matt